I don’t really know where I’m going with this post so I’m just going to start and see where we end up.
So recently I’ve been feeling pretty down and negative about the blogging community. Well, the fashion and beauty blogging community specifically. I’ve been feeling ignored, I’ve been feeling jealous of others and taking every little thing personally. Poor little me against the blogging world.
And that is not me. I love others success, even in my jealousy, it’s not the individual I feel negative about- I still think ‘good for them!’ – but then my mind feels poisoned with unhelpful comparisons.
Why didn’t my link get shared too?
Why wasn’t I invited to that event?
You will lend me clothes for a post but want them back? What a personal slight on me and my whole family!
You didn’t send me a lipstick? Damn you to Hell!
I’m being dramatic but you get the idea.
I was taking everything personally and judging myself by what I was seeing others doing/getting and this isn’t helpful. It breeds bad feeling and it’s got to the point where I just don’t enjoy this space any more, and I hate that. I didn’t start blogging 3 years ago for shares, for views, for free stuff, for events. I started it, not knowing all those things even existed, just for fun. I enjoyed writing about makeup, I enjoyed putting outfits together and I couldn’t care less if one person or 100 was reading. I did it purely for fun.
I want to get back to that, get back to me.
So I think I’m going to take a break for a while. Maybe. I might be back in two days feeling fully rejuvenated and happy again, but it might take a little longer than that. I don’t know. I’m not going to plan or worry. I’m just going to get on with my life and when I feel like I’ve stripped myself of this shitty attitude I will be back, and I’ll be better than ever because I’ll be happy.
I’ll still be posting over on my lifestyle blog so if you want to read what I’m up to or see more of Malta then do pay me a visit here. And I’ll still be on twitter, tumblr and instagram as usual so be sure to pop on by, have a nosy and say hello.
See you soon, I hope xxx